And is it wrong to feel demeaned by the requests?
Simply, and not even taken out of context, no.
Yet I feel like I've been knocked down???
Gripping on to the last rung before the bottom.
Staring at the soles of a pair of dirty shoes above me.

(And then so many other actions,
demeaning in their context,
I am able to rationalize as desire??)


I've been sick.
I wake up sweating at intervals in the night.
Feverish images slide slick in my brain.

It's troubling how much my own
trains of thought can churn my stomach.
But that kind of sick has nothing to do with a fever.


Have I bit off more than I can chew by simply living?
If it feels like a hassle sometimes to just breathe?